It is 1 a.m. here in lil ol' England and I can't sleep. Thus, I have decided to post something on the blog.
Trouble is, I don't have anything prepared so I've decided to ad lib. Yes, oh faithful readership, this will be an unabridged, unedited, unexpurgated and, probably, uninteresting post. Replete with spelling mistakes and poor grammar too, no doubt.
So, what do I write about? Erm...
I know! I'll give you a fascinating insight into a day in my life! Joy oh joy...
I couldn't get to sleep last night until 2.30 a.m. Then I had a nightmare in which I murdered someone and was so shocked by the experience that I woke up. Didn't get back to sleep for another half hour. Woke up at 5.30 and hit the snooze button repeatedly until about 8.00. Arrived at work late. (See? The disappointment starts even at that time in the morning...)
Had an uneventful day at work.
Popped round to my lady friend's house because she's off work sick at the moment. Had a cup of tea. Caught the wrong bus home and had to get off and wait for another one.
Ate a chicken stir-fry which was made by my flatmate. She is one of the worst cooks in the world. No really. The stir-fry contained whole spring onions (scallions, for transatlantic readers). For some reason, she didn't realise that they should probably be chopped. To make matters worse, she always cooks stir-fries on a low heat, but at the normal timings. Thus, the vegetable were 'al dente'. I've had better meals.
I then set up her new PC for her. Also tidied my room, which included cleaning my PC. I removed each key from the keyboard individually, wiped them thoroughly with a soft cloth and replaced them. You've never really known desperation and despair until you've done something like that.
Dyed my flatmate's hair. She cut my hair. Now my neck itches.
Drank a glass of vodka.
Logged on to the Internet.
And so, here I am!
I'm 31 years old and that was my day.
Now perhaps you can understand what a deep personal disappointment my life is in so many ways.
To make matters worse, I've just realised that there isn't a single amusing thing in this entire post. God almighty in heaven, today has been such a waste...
More fascinating insights next time.