First things first - I'm leaving the blog for a while. I received some feedback from someone recently who claimed that I seemed to be "bitter". Although I don't necessarily agree with that, I did re-read some of my posts and have realised that, well, I ain't as funny as I used to be.
This blog was always meant to represent a kind of heightened reality, sort of like Larry David in Curb Your Enthusiasm, where I could breathe life into a alternate version of myself and exaggerate certain elements of my life. Unfortunately, that hasn't happened lately. Instead, I've been maudlin and unamusing. It's been like watching a car crash as I've slowly spiralled into 'breakdown'. Nobody wants to see that, least of all me. So, I'm going on sabbatical. I may be back, I may not. We'll see.
In the meantime, I'll leave you in the capable hands of Benny C. Yeah, he isn't as funny as me, but he's just a youngster. One day he may cease to be my Padawan learner and become a Master.
I've been off work for the last few days with a sore throat, aching muscles, a blocked up nose, and a headache that has been constant for approximately 72 hours. I may kill something soon. So, apologies for not being amusing or entertaining.
Before I go, one last thing. Check this out: http://www.myheritage.com/FP/Company/face_recognition.php?s=1&u=g0&lang=EN&restore&category=1
You have to sign up with your e-mail address, but it's all kosher.
Upload a photograph of yourself and the website conducts a comparison with over 3,200 well known people, then gives you a list of those that you most closely resemble.
I uploaded two photos and found that I was a combination of the following:
Sean Penn - 67%
WB Yeats - 58%
Sting - 50%
Jude Law - 50%
Emilio Estevez - 48%
Charles Manson - 48%
Groucho Mark - 47%
So, if asked on an Internet chatroom, I shall claim that I'm a cross between Jude Law and Sean Penn, with a soupcon of Charlie Manson thrown in. If that doesn't get them interested, nothing will.